Now here is what I am up to in this part of my challenge…
“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:29-31 NIV)
Now why did I just add that here? “Love your neighbor as yourself”
So how can I love my neighbor, IF I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO LOVE OTHERS…
I am currently on the the 19th day of this challenge… Now here is what happened in the last few days…
The reason why I am only on day 19, is due to me having to think through the dare thus far…
Day 11 – Love cherishes…
Husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. (Ephesians 5:28 NASB)
How should marriage be seen?
There are two ways people view marriage….
The one way is how marriage is normally seen…
Say a man has a car. And is in a serious accident, in which the car is scrapped. Now at this point this man buys a new car to replace the car that was scrapped. Some people treat marriage this way… When there is a tough patch in a marriage or relationship, then divorce or break-up seems to become a very keen solution… But is this the actual way we should approach marriage?
Now for the second way of marriage…
So a mechanic breaks his arm… This is a part of who he is and he needs his arm for his life to continue… So what is he to do? Should he amputate his arm, or should he heal his arm? A mechanic would most likely get the best treatment to get his arm back to health and 100% working… Isn’t this how marriage should be?
Fighting is inevitable, tough patches can make your relationship grow closer, to love someone more…
But how does this make loving yourself easier?
Were you mad at yourself for hurting someone?
I have, I sometimes wished that I would have never had existed, because I feel like I always hurt those I really care about… I do not really know why… But sometimes I am thankful for being the time there was no one I could hurt… Yet, I care about many people, and I can’t see me being alone ever…
Loving oneself means you cherish even yourself… That you look at your bad habits and work to improve it… If you have friends who are willing to help, and are willing to stand by you through this, it would help a lot… Trying by yourself is much harder…
Day 12 – Love lets the other win…
Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4 NASB)
This was a tough day… Sometimes we think we have to win at any cost, yet what if we decide to rather listen to someone to understand why they believe, what they believe.
I am starting to wonder if we do not sometimes destroy ourselves with this exact same mentality?
I most days end up depressed, because I fail at being me… I just frustrate everyone, and everyone end up mad at me… I then do not have any way of beating it… This is because I feel like a failure most days… I fail at being a good friend, at doing what I love and fail most of all at loving myself…
BUT WHAT IF…?
What if I had grace on myself? What if I just looked at the positive about myself? Look at doing what I love? Just be the best friend I could be? We could have more grace on ourselves… Loving ourselves, doesn’t mean we do everything right and neglect ourselves… We can sometimes say no to some people… Especially when we have problems to sort out… If we believe we should help others, shouldn’t it also be fair if we accept help from those who care about us? Truly loving ourselves means we allow others in our lives.
If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. (Romans 12:18 NASB)
Day 13 – Love fights fair…
If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. (Mark 3:25 NASB)
I have seen many people fight… The thing which I realized was, people do not fight fair… NOT even close…
Have you ever reminded someone of a flaw while you were angry at them… Have you ever said something that destroyed someone’s confidence in themselves?
Do you think this is at all fair? Even a little?
Do we believe in a theory of war where we say that the guy with the biggest gun wins? Or do we try to think that every person is special?
Is it fair to destroy the ones you love with your words, because you think they are wrong?
I know I have done this…
I AM SORRY TO EVERYONE WHO I EVER DEGRADED AND TREATED UNFAIRLY, ESPECIALLY WHEN I WAS MAD OR HURT… AND THANKS TO THOSE WHO NEVER GAVE UP ON ME EVEN WHEN I WAS LIKE THIS…
Do we really love others to the extend where we can politely tell them what is bothering us about them, or do we get irritated so much that we tend to say stuff that hurt for decades to come… So much that the person wants to give up because they do not feel worthy of anything or anyone… That they feel that they are just in the way of everyone’s happiness… And that the person wants to leave because it hurts too much…
How do we fight fair with ourselves? Are we beating ourselves up for even the littlest thing we do wrong? Or do we feel that we can have a bit more grace on mistakes we make? Are we having more grace on others for a mistake, which, when we make it, we penalize ourselves for it?
How about we set up some guideline on what not to say when we are angry at ourselves? This would make the fight more fair even against ourselves…
Be of the same mind toward one another. (Romans 12:16 NASB)
Day 14 – Love takes delight…
Enjoy life with the wife you love all the days of your fleeting life. (Ecclesiastes 9:9 NASB)
How does one delight in someone? How do we choose to continue loving someone, even when that person destroys us? Hurts us? Or even rejects us?
It is not easy… I do know, due to being rejected by people daily, being destroyed with the words of those I thought I could always trust, and being hurt so many times….
How about the times that we let people go, because they made a mistake? Or do we tend to keep those who destroyed us close, because we can’t let go?
I know I have said stuff that hurt people … Unfortunately to some whom I cared about the most…
I would like to apologize for this… I AM REALLY SORRY FOR NOT ALWAYS DELIGHTING IN THE FRIENDSHIPS I HAVE WITH YOU… I WANT TO START NOW, BUT NOT SURE HOW TO DELIGHT IN FRIENDSHIP… IF YOU WOULD ALLOW ME, THEN I COULD LEARN… I KNOW I AM NOT PERFECT, AND I WOULD LOVE TO LEARN HOW TO DELIGHT IN FRIENDSHIPS…
How do we delight in ourselves?
Why do we not have this feeling about ourselves? Why do we not accept forgiveness when someone forgives us?
Do we struggle to forgive ourselves, because we see ourselves at a higher expectations, because be know what we do, and when we are wrong? But didn’t Jesus also die for this? Didn’t he forgive us anyway, knowing we would mess up so much?
How about when someone says that we are forgiven? Why do we struggle to accept it? We are wrong, yet sometimes we do make mistakes, we were born in sin, meaning our first instincts are sometimes wrong… And we can make a mistake, why not have more grace on ourselves… To delight in ourselves means that we also look for the good in ourselves… And not just break ourselves down…
God bless